Like many of the wives of Software Engineer Mappillais from America, I migrated to US after my college and marriage. 500 N Maryland Ave Apt. 1. My first apartment! I had a grand welcome into the home – No, no! I did not have a big crowd or to receive me or anything but my new husband did this “arti” and had the real “grihapravesham” – rice kicking and stuff for me. It felt straight out of a Shah Rukh movie! Our newly wed blissful life was completely centered on this apartment!

The apartment wasn’t big luxurious, fancy spitting out grandeur or anything. On the contrary it was 1975 built, raggedly old building. In spite of that it was cozy and functional!

My initial reaction to the apartment was that I was so positively psyched by the idea of living in Glendale downtown amidst all the tall buildings! Being a small town girl from Palakkad the city life was so alluring to me then! When I first moved in there was not a single piece of furniture in the house; it was an open floor plan. Adit waited for me to come so that we could pick the furniture and all the related bells and whistles together. So that it reflected on both of us. Little by little furniture here and there or the entertainment center here crept in! The research and shopping for our living room furniture was an adventure by itself. As soon as we furnished the place we were excited to take pictures and call our family back in India on Skype to show what we had done to the place. Yep! We do have before and after pictures! Hehehe!

Experiencing the thrill for the first time on our own was an incredible event for both Adit and me! Freedom! Adit and I have lived through some of our best moments here! I remember the time I cooked my first 4 course South Indian meal for my husband. I was super excited to be cooking for him and to see if he had liked it. Speaking of cooking, this tiny kitchen has seen the best and worst of my cooking. On my very first day, I ruined the garbage disposer and Adit had an episode with the apartment manager – trying to explain to him that his new Indian bride did not know how to use it (Gulp! I put in raw carrot chunks to see if it broke – it really broke it down!)

In spite of the undependable manager, cabinets falling apart, cranky-undependable toilet, noisy neighbors (I’ll never forgive you 24 Hour Fitness & the annoying shredding Company for all the noise that you make!), spider bites, late laundry hours, our experience in our first apartment lived up to its promise and glamour of being all grown up! I love you but nay! I am not going to miss you!!

Its not as dramatic as Jumpa Lahiri’s Namesake but my name has a story too.

Its been a while since I bid a tearful fareful to “Vaishnavi Thatha”. Vaishnavi Thatha! Aah! A perfect match! Its not that I am a feminist or anything but somehow after being attached to it for 23 years you kinda get stuck to it. I remember my brother tease me about changing the name , I shrugged it off in my pre-marriage euphoria. To think of it, I changed the name at the drop of a hat. (Psst..Inspite of a lot of paperwork!) I did not even realize I loved “Thatha” so much till the day I went for my Visa Interview months after my wedding. “Can I have your papers Mrs. Gollapudi?” “MRS GOLLAPUDI?????”!!! Me?? ” was my knee-jerk reaction. Responding to this new surname was like responding to a new name altogether! I felt different. I felt not me. I was scared and wondered if I had just made the worst decision of my life! What did I end up doing?! I had always been a happy go lucky person and all of a sudden I remembered a numerologist’s words (Who I thought was spinning a cock and bull story then!!) that said a name is everything to a person. I wondered if I would be impacted with this change? Will my stars change? Will all my luck change? Did I just make a pig in the poke decision?!

My friends have always told me,”Vaishnavi Thatha” is so you”! I don’t know what they meant but apparently even they thought it was my identity.

Fast Forward!

US of A. I played the new kid in the block – new country, new husband, new faces, new culture and new everything! The change in the whole atmosphere helped me to gradually step into the shoes of “Vaishnavi Gollapudi” without much struggles. Yes, you are right! There is a “BUT” factor involved. America doesn’t pronounce my name right. The problem was no longer about my last name. This time the focus was my first name. “Vaayeshnayvee” is the closest to “Vaishnavi” that I have been addressed to. I noticed people start twitching with discomfort when they are introduced to me.

Aydeetya (Yep, that is Aditya) introduces, “Meet my wife, Vaishnavi”.

Vaishnavi says, “Hello, Mr.X. Nice to meet you.”

Mr. X, “Vaa..errr..Vaayeesh.nn…(struggles, stammers)”

Vaish thinks, “Stop trippin man! My name is not that hard to pronounce!

Vaishnavi cuts in trying to salvage her name, “Its VAI-Shh-NAVI”. You can call me VAISH.”

Mr. X,”Oh wow! that is pretty! so exotic! err…Nice to meet you, VAAYEESH”.

The story continues.

You know what was pathetic about the whole thing? Eventually, I started to introducing myself as Vaayeesh and noticed it it only when my uncle called on me for that. Darn! There were times I resented saying my name at dinner reservations, doctor appointment. I just resented the mispronunciation of my name by me or by others. period.

Its been a while now and most of my village calls me Vaish. Things are getting peaceful – around me and IN me. I don’t know if your name is the most important label in life but it is an integral part of your identity.

More on a positive note: Since the movie avatar came on recently, I have been able to get people to understand “Navi”! I am Vaish-Navi..Naavi as in Avatar! Thanks James Cameron!

T. Vaishnavi to Vaishnavi T to Vaishnavi Thatha to Vaishnavi Gollapudi to Vaayeeshnne errrr to Vaayeesh to Vaish-Naavi!

This is has been the evolutionary adventure of my lovely name, In war and peace.

PS: Vaishnavi is incarnation of divine mother, Shakti, Goddess, Consort of Vishnu, the creator.

I have beaten bushes wrecking my foot gears.

Why have you hidden from my eyes?

Did you not hear my cries?

You are as valued as “true love” to a lass,

Did I not find you since I gained more mass?

In the core of my heart, knew I’ll find you in my way…

Truly, I did not care about the price to pay!

Holding aces, I couldn’t believe my lucky star,

When I walked into this Glendale Bazaar!

Holding you, not wanting to get my hopes high,

I bore you, and My My My!!!!

Hearing bells ring, I saw a light…

I thanked gods for understanding my plight.

Hugging my body in ideal means,

I’m so glad I found you my perfect jeans!!

A long anticipating wait, the embarrassment of being the one with the rotting tooth (especially if the dentist’s evil elf is a cute one!), the agony of opening your jaw forever (You wonder-has the time stopped???), your appeal for clemency (on the sight of tiny but powerful looking diabolic munitions), intimidating light glaring at your face) which you don’t understand why is enraged at you), gushing and drilling din… Sigh!!!!!!! The endless list! It is a frightening war you can’t escape. It is a battle between you and the persistent dentist!!!

The after-thoughts of the entire ordeal made me tumble upon one hell of a realization- Man! I am not surprised that it was the dentist who invented the electric chair!!!